Our wedding vows: disaster, Wordsworth’esque, somewhere inbetween?

Note: “Petaya” is “Pete” and “Saya” smooshed together. #petaya was the hashtag we used for our wedding.

We went to a wedding last night. I read Ten Ways I Trimmed $21,000 Off My Wedding Budget (and its comments) today.

It being two weeks after our wedding, I found myself comparing.

Not in the negative, bitchy way. “She wore that?” “They got married there?!” “They spent how much on a live-band?!”

In the “it’s fascinating that a word – wedding – can mean so many different things to people” way. Love, stress, tradition, loved ones, spreadsheets, pressure, happiness, freedom, suffocation, extravagance, waste, companionship, bliss, ball gown, flip-flops…And that what is so important to one person – food, dancing, music, venue, size, favors, decor, alcohol – is not even a blip on another person’s radar.

At the wedding last night, I was struck by how lovely the vows were. And how different they were from ours.

Notecards. Concise. Written together (or at least they discussed their sentiments), which you could tell by the words they both repeated and the themes they both touched upon. A few tears on the Bride’s part, dry eyes on the Groom’s part. Beautifully written, beautifully articulated.

That last part I hope wasn’t different from ours. It’s hard to have perspective about words you pen for such an emotional event.

If you digested the wrap-up of our nuptials, Our fairytale $24K wedding for $11K, er $790, you’re aware that Husband and I did exactly what “they” say you shouldn’t do with your vows, which is wait until the last minute. He wrote them a few days before, I the morning of. We also didn’t really discuss them, other than a three-minute conversation agreeing that we should agree on the “style” we were going for – funny, introspective, looking back, looking forward… we never got beyond that agreement and then just went our own ways.

Thank goodness we had video. Because the vows were a blur and I remembered little.

After getting note after note from guests —

“Such a memorable, authentic, moving and super fun celebration. Still keep playing all the lovely details over in my mind. Best vows ever!”

“I feel so blessed to have attended one of the most memorable, inspiring and meaningful weddings that I have ever attended. As I lay here, reflecting on the weekend and last night, my heart is full.”

“We had 2 weddings this past weekend and they were great and beautiful, but also made me really appreciate how very personal and pitch perfectly Petaya your wedding celebration was. People like me who aren’t fortunate to be a part of your day to day life really got to feel and understand the core of your relationship, and being invited to be a part of that is such a big, warm, hug of a gift.”

I was curious, excited, nervous to relive the moment…

Note: the music playing underneath the vows is neither music that was added in during editing nor music that was supposed to be played during the ceremony. It’s “frustrating neighbors ‘ruining’ our wedding blasting their weird music” music. Try to disregard.